Floating Buttocks

In the year 1887, renowned anatomist Dr. Cornelius Fitch attempted a revolutionary experiment to prove that the human form could achieve transcendence through selective corporeal separation, isolating what he believed to be the "seat of earthly desires" and launching it into the ethereal plane. The procedure succeeded beyond his wildest imaginings—too well, in fact—and the disembodied posterior became sentient, developing a peculiar consciousness that drifted through dimensions seeking the body it had been severed from, leaving behind only the faint scent of lavender and regret. Over the decades, this supernatural posterior gained a following of occultists who believed it to be a messenger from the realm of forgotten shame, capable of granting visions to those pure of heart and nightmares to those of questionable morality. It floats silently through abandoned theaters and forgotten ballrooms, occasionally phasing through walls and leaving behind inexplicable handprints on dusty furniture, as if searching for a mirror in which to contemplate its lonely existence. Some say that on moonless nights, you can hear it weeping softly, mourning the day it was torn from its original purpose and condemned to eternal wandering. Philosophers and madmen alike have devoted their lives to understanding its purpose, though the creature itself remains an enigma—neither alive nor dead, neither physical nor spiritual, but something altogether other. To this day, the Floating Buttocks continues its melancholic journey through the spaces between worlds, a monument to scientific hubris and the unexpected consequences of mankind's arrogance.

Strength

10, modifier 0

Dexterity

14, modifier +2

Constitution

18, modifier +4

Intelligence

16, modifier +3

Wisdom

18, modifier +4

Charisma

20, modifier +5

Ethereal Touch

The Floating Buttocks can reach out to touch a creature within 10 ft., dealing 3d8 psychic damage on a hit.

Haunting Wail

As an action, the Floating Buttocks emits a mournful wail. All creatures within 30 ft. must succeed on a DC 16 Wisdom saving throw or be frightened for 1 minute.

Lavender Mist

The Floating Buttocks releases a cloud of lavender-scented mist in a 20 ft. radius. Creatures in the area must succeed on a DC 15 Constitution saving throw or be poisoned for 1 minute.

Spectral Grasp

The Floating Buttocks can attempt to grapple a creature within 10 ft. using its ethereal form. On a success, the target is restrained until the end of its next turn.

Ethereal Drift

The Floating Buttocks can phase through walls and obstacles, moving silently.

strength

+0

dexterity

+2

constitution

+4

intelligence

+3

wisdom

+4

charisma

+5

Necrotic

Poison